I am not fat.
At least, I wouldn't tell you that I was. But when I look in the mirror or just feel my skin or see that number on the scale...all I'm thinking is...
FAT FAT FAT FATFATFAT!!!
We all have those stories, you know? My 'first' boyfriend (though I don't really count him anymore) broke up with me by calling me a 'fat tub of lard.' He then got the entire baseball team to laugh at me and call me a 'beached whale.'
And so my husband can say that I'm beautiful all he wants, and I must admit that I DO believe him sometimes, but there are times when I'm thinking...'You are totally just trying to flatter me.'
I think I do that with God sometimes. He says 'I love you' and I think, 'Yeah, I don't think you could love me.' And I would ask, 'Why would you love me?' And I could hear Him say, 'Does there have to be a reason? I love you because I made you.'
I get so frustrated sometimes with my husband. I tell him that I'm fat and he always says, 'I don't know what you're talking about.' YOU didn't hear them telling you that. YOU didn't have to be laughed at by everyone.
But Jesus had it so much worse. Understatement of the year.
I just need to leave it at the cross and let Jesus take it up and just KNOW that God loves me, 5 pounds heavier or 5 pounds lighter.